thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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