Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.