so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
