the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
