morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
