dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
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