After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
