Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
how does that bad decision feel?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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