stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
