I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.