I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
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