my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize