Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
