He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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