It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
