her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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