Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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