We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Actions speak louder than pants.
two words...techno handjob
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
