i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
