whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize