In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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