it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
