Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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