your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
