Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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