i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
