I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
