No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
