D3 body, D1 cock
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
P.S. I can't hear my feet
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
