I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
