wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
