I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Randomize
