first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
