At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
