hotel room ftw
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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