.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
