Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
my sisters under your porch take her home
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
