I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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