Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize