going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
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