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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.

  (1-734): View more from Michigan

  Shittttttt.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show

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• (949): View more from California

  I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (626): View more from California

  i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?

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• (305): View more from Florida

  May the power of my ass compel you!!

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.

  (816): View more from Missouri

  May his noodley appendage touch you.

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