We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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