i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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