This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
