someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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