Me. At least after what I've been through.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
