I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
