actually, I'm a sock model
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize