morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
