I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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