I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
