I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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