we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.